If you can't see it, zoom in, that's original size and I had to zoom in to see tiny print under a few.
Everyone keeps trying to find a freaking bang Gwendolyn and Coily. Those who find it fruitless say they'll go gay for Rolf, or resort to fucking Cantelo. It's odd considering they little intro says there are other people like you with these creatures, why not hook up with someone on the island?
Also, to clear up some things...
-All of them are your friends to some degree. Even Mildred and Gwendolyn. Also, some are a lot more loyal than normal, which means those not super loyal might not always agree with what you want to do, but generally will do what you want. Exceptions being Mildred and Gwen.
-Mildred doesn't like you and never will. Using Boleslava on her won't make her like you more, just make her happier. That can still work in your favor though... She does not, however, hate you. She won't let you die or anything, but she probably will often mess with you. Oh you want food? Here, have some moldy bread. I can only see her killing you if you try attacking her or threatening her.
-The tiny text says this for him, but Womba-Womba can only be of any help in anything combat related. Don't expect him to help with digging or gathering food (though hunting seems plausible).
-Cantelo will do any task... to the best of its ability. Don't expect it to be able to build shelter too well.
-Archie can build great things and all, but realize he can only use materials around the island. (People kept thinking he'd build them a fortress of doom).
-Kazoo deems the following acts evil: Murder (unless in self defense or for food, but the food cannot be a sentient being), Theft, Torture, Rape, Bestiality, and stealing Womba Womba's hat (this according to some guy who drew the hella funtime friends)
-Kleptsy's alien weaponry can do some pretty advanced shit, but remember that they are cheap and easily can break. (Some people made scenarios where they'd mind control Mildred to do their bidding, failing to realize that the alien weaponry is cheap pieces of crap, therefore likely couldn't do desired effects for long and eventually break after too much use).
-Unknown how much water = death for Mr. Pepper, but I believe it to be a thing like water = bullets. If those bullets hit vital areas, he dies, otherwise is sick or something (thus damp weather makes him highly uncomfortable).
With all of that out of the way, choices need to be made.
I would probably choose Mildred and Cantelo, and here's why.
Mildred potentially is the best friend to have because she can attack and supply you with food. She doesn't like you, and probably won't help you at time, but in a desperate situation, it's nice to have someone who can head explode and provide food.
|Though she might get rather annoying...|
Biggest problem would be shelter, considering I'd likely have to be the main builder. Maybe I would get lucky and run into another person to group with who had Archie, and we could team up. Mildred could be a decent ace in the hole, even if not a reliable one.
I think my approach on Mildred would be based on trades and favors in order to get her to do something. I doubt it'd work all the time, but every now and then, it'd be nice to get a food I haven't had in ages.
So readers... who would you pick? What would be your plan of action?